It has been 10 years since father passed away. With time the memory of him simultaneously fades and also sharpens. Some of the details of past events become harder to recall - yet the core of the memory becomes more solidified and the contours of his impressions on all of us become sharper.
As we celebrate him today, on Dec 8th, 2018 - one detail that comes to the forefront of my mind is this. While father was always known for his passion for music, literature and everything classical - these days I'm thinking more of him in terms of the emphasis he placed on thinking and thought. How he valued thought, mostly intellectual thought, and passed that value to all in his life. Recently, my sister brought my attention to a talk given by Sadguru, a noted and popular wiseman these days. In that, he says "thinking for oneself", "believing but only by separately convincing oneself of truth" are hallmarks of quintessential Indian soul. Those words fit father very well. The direct impact this had on me was during my early adulthood. At that time, I had questions, which I daresay, occur to many a young person. Questions on the nature of existence, why we are here, what is the meaning of life etc. The first sign of father's upbringing is that I felt comfortable bringing these questions to him. At that time I did not appreciate how rare it indeed was to have such bond at that age. Secondly, while my questions were indicative of my amateur mind, he communicated how special they were - thus in turn encouraging me on a life long journey of search, questioning and thoughtfulness.
Looking back on father's life, I'm also reminded of a famous distinction drawn by a noted journalist and thinker named David brooks. He contrasts between "resume virtues" and "eulogy virtues" - the former a measure of material success in one's life and the later a measure of the fond memories others have of the person. Most people would tell my father that he could have had much more success than he did in life - sometimes indicating that perhaps he should do more for success. But I suspect, he recognized the above distinction more clearly and struck a balance between immediate success and long term values. Most importantly, as time passes, I find myself thinking of him with more love than I had imagined I was capable of. May God bless his soul.
As we celebrate him today, on Dec 8th, 2018 - one detail that comes to the forefront of my mind is this. While father was always known for his passion for music, literature and everything classical - these days I'm thinking more of him in terms of the emphasis he placed on thinking and thought. How he valued thought, mostly intellectual thought, and passed that value to all in his life. Recently, my sister brought my attention to a talk given by Sadguru, a noted and popular wiseman these days. In that, he says "thinking for oneself", "believing but only by separately convincing oneself of truth" are hallmarks of quintessential Indian soul. Those words fit father very well. The direct impact this had on me was during my early adulthood. At that time, I had questions, which I daresay, occur to many a young person. Questions on the nature of existence, why we are here, what is the meaning of life etc. The first sign of father's upbringing is that I felt comfortable bringing these questions to him. At that time I did not appreciate how rare it indeed was to have such bond at that age. Secondly, while my questions were indicative of my amateur mind, he communicated how special they were - thus in turn encouraging me on a life long journey of search, questioning and thoughtfulness.
Looking back on father's life, I'm also reminded of a famous distinction drawn by a noted journalist and thinker named David brooks. He contrasts between "resume virtues" and "eulogy virtues" - the former a measure of material success in one's life and the later a measure of the fond memories others have of the person. Most people would tell my father that he could have had much more success than he did in life - sometimes indicating that perhaps he should do more for success. But I suspect, he recognized the above distinction more clearly and struck a balance between immediate success and long term values. Most importantly, as time passes, I find myself thinking of him with more love than I had imagined I was capable of. May God bless his soul.
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